As you may well imagine, I read a great deal about the state of boys' education. Perhaps you do too. Coverage of the “manosphere” crisis has been difficult to ignore. Much of the literature is deeply concerning on a national and global scale and requires collective action. As I digest the research on the state of boys and men, I try to synthesize what the data means for our students.
Let me tell you why I am optimistic about boys at A-S.
We have a clear purpose and the methods to achieve it. We endeavor to know boys as individuals, to celebrate boyhood, and to prepare them for life beyond A-S. Following a recent admissions open house, a prospective parent described our school as an “antidote” to the broader male crisis often discussed by the media today. In particular, she noted, our emphasis on developing boys’ expressive language skills (visible thinking) stands out in a heads-down digital age. Furthermore, hearing a panel of eighth-graders speak in complete paragraphs about their paths to high school readiness set us apart from the other schools she visited. Her takeaway was clear: the intentionality behind our work is visible, and she could see our “open architecture” in action.
We are small enough to cultivate our own garden. Independent schools represent about two percent of the American education sector. Boys' education accounts for only about five percent of the independent sector (all-girls schools are close to eight percent), so we are quite specialized in the marketplace. Within the boy-school network, Allen-Stevenson possesses a distinctive brand. We are cosmopolitan: over twenty languages are spoken in A-S homes. We are especially well-rounded: ninety percent of boys play an instrument, sing, and play a sport. We are modern: eighth graders take ethics, coding, and improv. 100% percent of recent graduates said they would recommend A-S. Put another way, we are a school where everybody knows your name and collectively ups your game.
Our “boyology” practice is research-based and tells us what works. Boyology is at the heart of what we do, and it has a simple, powerful premise. Boys are not a problem to be fixed; they are people to be understood. As longtime boy expert Michael Thompson says, “boy development is trustworthy.” Our job as a school is to explain the developmental arc for boys and their parents. For example, a young boy who struggles to sit still at a desk in a quiet classroom may be perceived as being defiant or having an attention disorder, failing to consider the typical boy’s developmental need for physical movement, hands-on learning, and full-body engagement. In short, our emphasis on the stages of boy development makes boyhood more legible to parents. At a time when faith in institutions wanes, families tell us they can trust A-S.
Traditions help boys to be bigger than themselves. Founders Day (the school’s birthday) is a chance for our students to understand the long tradition of which they are an integral part. This year’s proud parade up and down East 78th Street, orchestrated by Ms. Spielberg and conducted by Chris Acerbo, was a statement of boy pride and civic positivity as students cheered the NYPD officers who assured that our street was closed to traffic. Our young alumni speakers, Luca Micheletto ‘22 and Gabriel Viscogliosi ‘22, evangelized the superhero powers of kindness and service, traits that contribute to boys’ journey as scholars and gentlemen. Such traditions help us celebrate boyhood, nurture positive peer influence, and connect boys to the wider world in accessible ways.
The proof is in the alumni. We will always measure our success by the well-lived lives of our alumni and how they feel about their alma mater. A recent survey indicated that 100% of recent alumni said they would recommend A-S, which is, in part, why we debuted an alumni internship program. This initiative provided both paid and unpaid opportunities for young men to return to A-S and support our summer administrative work, and gain valuable work experience. Additionally, our interns had the privilege of meeting several alumni, including Matt Harb ‘03, Head of Strategy & Operations for Google Cloud; Mike and Alex Faherty '98, Co-founders of Faherty Brand; and our beloved former nurse, Ashley Coiffard, Co-owner of the runaway success, L’Appartement 4F bakery. Connecting generations of A-S graduates is fulfilling, but it also allows us to hear directly and in-depth from our alumni how A-S set the high standard for what education should be and how that standard has enabled the professional pursuits that followed.
For reasons such as these, we have many reasons to be optimistic about the boys in our care. As an independent school, we are not free from the effects of societal forces such as the manosphere, but we have the resources to counter it. When we create the conditions for student success, we see how eager boys are for their trusted adults to acknowledge, understand, and see them, not simply for their potential, but also for who they are now. While A-S is far from perfect, ultimately, we allow boys to grow on pace and path, building the vocabulary and confidence to self-advocate as well as the empathy to better understand those around them.
Such intentionality is our answer, a needed "antidote" even, to the concerning literature on the state of boys and men. Perhaps this is because, as one teacher puts it: A-S is a comfortable place to be uncomfortable. In some ways, this is nothing new. Allen-Stevenson has always offered boys and their families ways to manage the demands of today and prepare for the issues of tomorrow. Fortiter et recte endures.
